Therapy
by Amelius88
Summary: Booth and Brennan have another session with Dr Sweets. It could have gone better.
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **Therapy

**Author:**retrograde/Amelius (on Bones

**Pairing: **UST B/B

Disclaimer: Bones belongs to its writers/producers/tv network etc. Not me.

**Rating: **um, teen? Conversations about sex involved.

**Spoilers: **minor, but through to 3x05

**Summary: **Booth and Brennan have another session with Dr. Sweets. It could have gone better.

**Notes:** I might have to do a follow-up story because this is so not even close to what I intended to write. It just…took over, somehow. I'm not particularly comfortable with it – humor is certainly not my forte, nor is dialogue – so let me know what you think.

**Therapy**

There was astonished, disbelieving silence. Dr. Sweets shifted nervously as his two patients stared at him in open mouthed disbelief. He didn't know exactly what they were thinking, but he was pretty sure it wasn't going to end well… for him.

"Unresolved…._what?_" Agent Booth managed to say, eyes boring into the increasingly uneasy psychologist.

"Sexual tension. Unresolved sexual tension." Dr. Sweets managed to squeak. He cleared his throat. "That is to say that you…."

"We understand the technical definition of the phrase," Dr. Brennan interrupted, looking at him as if he were a particularly uncooperative fossil. "But your application is patently false. Even though neither Booth nor I are currently involved in a romantic or sexual relationship, the practice of onanism amongst adults is perfectly natural and more than capable of supplying the necessary endorphins to relieve sexual tension."

Dr. Sweets blinked, and opened his mouth. Then he closed it, blinked again, and realized he had absolutely no idea what to say to that. Dr. Brennan was proving to be something of a therapeutical challenge, in more ways than one.

"Ona-what?" Agent Booth asked, clearly missing the implication of his partner's retort.

"Masturbation, Booth." Dr. Brennan replied calmly.

Booth looked startled, then mortified. "Hey! Now hang on a minute…"

"It's perfectly natural, Booth," Bones interrupted. "Adults have biological needs which must be tended to even without the presence of a mate, and…"

"Whoa, ok, that's… Can we not talk about mating, please?" Booth asked imploringly.

"Why not?" Brennan challenged. "We're rational, mature people. The fact that you have hang-ups about sexual activity is a reflection of your religious upbringing, not the nature of the act itself."

"I do not have hang-ups about sex!" Booth sputtered indignantly. "I'll have you know I have a perfectly _normal _and _healthy_ sex life. And don't start on the Catholic thing again," he added for good measure.

"I'm just saying that you were clearly uncomfortable during the investigation into Mr Ed…" Brennan pointed out.

"And you weren't?" Booth looked at her disbelievingly. "C'mon, Bones, you can't tell me that was normal."

"Actually, anthropologically speaking role play is quite common throughout the sexual activities of many societies." Brennan retorted.

Dr. Sweets cleared his throat before his patients throttled each other. "As I was saying, this bickering is clearly a manifestation of the unresolved sexual tension you feel _toward each other,_" he clarified for Dr. Brennan's sake.

Silence. And then…

"You **do** know I carry a gun, right?" Agent Booth glared at him. "And I'm not afraid to use it."

"I carry a gun too!" Dr. Brennan put in. "And mine is bigger than his," she added for good measure.

Booth rolled his eyes. "Yeah, so big that you can't use it, Bones. Lot of help that's going to be."

"I can use it!" Brennan glared at her partner. "Possibly the grip is slightly too large to fit the proportions of my hands correctly, but that does not render the gun unusable!"

"Except that last time you used it, _you shot me!_" Booth retorted.

"That was an accident, Booth! And I apologized." Brennan huffed.

"Oh, so that makes it ok for you to be carrying a gun so big you can't even…"

Dr. Sweets sighed. It was going to be a very long session.


	2. Chapter 2

**Spoilers: **minor, but through to 3x05

**Disclaimer: **Did I put one of these in before? I can't remember. Oh well – I own nothing. It all belongs to the wonderful writers/producers and the…network… that isn't playing any more episodes until January! glares

**A/N: **So I wrote this as a follow up but then I saw this week's episode (3x09 Santa in the Slush) and I won't give anything away but wow! And canon has just killed my inspiration for this particular plot line. So I don't know if I'll continue this. But here's a little more, at any rate.

Chapter Two

OoOoOoOoO

Seeley Booth thought he might never in his life have been as glad to leave somewhere, as he was leaving that therapist's office. Unresolved sexual tension, honestly. What was the kid thinking? Sweets obviously didn't know what he was talking about; probably been reading too many comic books or something.

Booth smirked, yeah, that made sense, the kid was just projecting his own problems onto them. It had nothing to do with him and Brennan at all, probably. He turned to Bones with the intention of sharing this revelation, but was taken aback suddenly by her profile, highlighted by the full moon overhead and distant street lights.

For some reason, his words caught in his throat. Maybe it was the echo of that therapist _(unresolved sexual tension)_ but all of a sudden Booth was overwhelmed by the sight of his partner. It wasn't that he didn't usually notice her; his partner was beautiful, he knew that. But tonight he was almost entranced.

Booth shook his head fiercely, berating himself for his thoughts. Ok, Bones was a hottie. Not a problem; it certainly didn't mean the kid was right or anything. They were just partners, after all.

Except when they weren't; when they ate dinner together and talked about their work, and their lives and their families. When he comforted her about her messed up family and when she tried, in her awkward way, to make him feel better about his.

But that was normal, right? It didn't mean anything more than they were friends, and partners, and knew each other pretty damn well. It certainly didn't mean there was 'unresolved sexual tension' between them.

Booth opened his mouth, and went to speak, when he caught a glance of Bones out of the corner of his eye. It was pretty dark, and he thought he might be seeing things because…was she _blushing_?

"Bones, are you blushing?" he asked, curious.

"What? No!" Brennan replied emphatically, turning her head away.

"You are!" Booth said delightedly. "Ha! The unflappable Dr. Brennan, embarrassed by a little sex talk, hey? What happened to "it's perfectly natural, Booth"?" he did a bad imitation of his partner's voice.

"I'm **not** embarrassed," Bones asserted forcefully. "You're seeing things, Booth."

They were at the car now. Booth turned to face his partner. "I am not seeing things, Bones," he retorted. "See?" he reached out and gently ran a finger over her cheek, feeling the warmth it was radiating and then… he froze.

Suddenly, he was noticing how Bones' eyes were glittering and her lips were pink and _god she was beautiful and how far down did that blush go anyway?_

He tried to reprimand himself, tried to banish the images of bare pink skin and how she'd look spread out over his sheets… but every time he tried to make the image go away, all he could hear was a voice in his head saying '_unresolved sexual tension'_.

Damn Sweets anyway.

"Booth?" Bones' voice was breathy and distant and he just stared at her, overwhelmed suddenly by the knowledge that this was his _partner_, this was _Bones, _and _god he wanted her._

"Booth…" it was a whisper this time, and she was looking at him with those glittering eyes and he was leaning forward, bending his head and…

_Bang!_ The backfire made them both jump backwards, guiltily, like children caught red-handed. They looked at each other wide eyed, and it was like a mantra they were both listening to: _unresolvedsexualtension, unresolvedsexualtension._

"Um," Bones stuttered uncharacteristically.

"Uh," Booth said with his voice a little higher than normal. He cleared his throat. "Let's get going, hey?"

"Sure," Brennan nodded emphatically, cheeks clearly flushed in the moonlight. There was an awkward pause as they determinedly didn't look at each other before suddenly they both leapt for the car.

By mutual agreement the ride home was silent. Brennan mumbled something unintelligible at her door _(it might have been goodbye)_ and didn't turn around to watch as Booth drove off into the night.


End file.
